Netflix February 2016_day.21 – National Treasure (2004)

_For a long time, I didn’t really get the idea behind Schrodinger’s Cat. I was always like “…what the hell, it either is or it isn’t. It’s not both.” I never really understood the point.

You know what helped me get it? The game Zero Escape: Virtue’s Last Reward.

Thanks for helping me grasp the concept of Schrodinger’s Cat, video games. I appreciate it.


“A daring historian deciphers clues that will lead him to hidden treasure … if he can get to it before anyone else.”

Join the search for National Treasure.

_Classic adventure treasure hunt movie scenario: There’s our hero, the good guy treasure hunter, then…there’s the bad guy treasure hunter. Both after the same goal, but for different reasons. Good guy usually enjoys finding pieces of historical significance. Bad guy just wants the wealth and moneyz and is willing to do anything to get it. The good guy is usually way better at actually hunting treasure, despite not having anywhere close to as much resources as the bad guy. The bad guy is usually content to basically do no actual clue gathering or deciphering and just mooch off the good guy’s hard work, until near the end, when they take somebody hostage or steal a necessary item needed to unlock something. They then force the good guy to accompany them into the final dungeon, which really isn’t much different from the rest of the movie, since the bad guys were already following them, but now, they’re actual traveling partners and can each throw verbal jabs at how much they detest one another as they proceed through the end-game catacomb.

That description basically can be thrown onto a whole bunch of adventure movies. Da Da Vinci Code; every Indiana Jones movie save Temple; Goonies; all the Uncharted games; Tomb Raider…it would probably be a more cited thing if there were more of these types of adventure movies made.

_So, all that said…in the 2nd scene of the movie, we’re introduced to Nic Cage and Sean Bean, working together to find a boat in the arctic. So, naturally, I think to myself “Oh fuck, there’s no way Sean Bean isn’t the bad guy by the end of this movie.” Turns out that I was being too lenient. He does his heel turn before they even leave the boat! Quick work, Sean. Quick work.

_Diane Kruger looks amazing in this. That’s all. Facts.

_I love that there’s basically a 15 minute heist sequence in this film, and that it’s for stealing the Declaration of Independence, of all things. And it’s the 2nd part of the movie!

_I love that in these kinds of movies, they always use clues and goose chases as great excuses to film in exotic locales all over the world. So in National Treasure, they visit exotic locales like…Washington, D.C. Philadelphia. New York.

I notice no one ever seems to bury any clues in Detroit.

_Man, the Knights Templar were a busy group. Between this, Da Vinci Code and Last Crusade, how much historical shit did they find and hide? I’m surprised they didn’t mix up any of the clues. “Time to find the treasure the Freemasons hid in the colonies…the resting place of Mary Magdaline?”

_You can really tell this is a Disney movie from the ending. As opposed to Sean Bean getting caught in some kind of decapitating poison spike ball trap, he just gets arrested and sent to jail. Yeah, take that! A fitting end for his kind!


_Come by tomorrow where we dive into what is surely a sci-fi classic. Barbarella. See you then~

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